When you were young, did you ever predict your future age for...
Cultivating a career?
My magic number for marriage was 26. I figured my mom was married at 24. I would get engaged at 25, and married by 26.
My magic number for my first child was 28. After the wedding, we'd wait about a year or so and then I would get pregnant. I would be 28 when the baby came. We would have at least three children, and I would be done with all of my pregnancies by 35.
My magic number to be a career woman was 30. I would be independently wealthy and professionally fulfilled by 30; because when you are young, you figure that you have SO MUCH time between your teenage years and being 30 that you SHOULD BE able to accomplish a lifetime of achievements by then.
This year, I will be 29. The only thing I have "accomplished" is marriage (and I was 2 years late, according to my calculations). Isn't it funny how life steps in and we realize what little say we have over most of the big milestones? We know we shouldn't try to control these things, but sometimes we try to anyway. (Maybe we do control the direction of our careers, but it's not nearly as easy as I thought it would be.)
I have this girlfriend who constantly hounds her boyfriend to "marry her" because she's "getting so old". Well, she's 29. I told her I didn't think that was old. She told me that it was easy for me to say that because I was already married. At first, I felt she was being ridiculous. But then I realized that lately I have been pressuring myself to have a baby by 30, because my magic list told me I should have delivered my first baby last year.
The list follows me wherever I go. I haven't shredded it to bits, but I have used some white-out, re-configured it, and created a few amendments.
What about you? Did you ever have "a list"?