Lately, I have felt like my plate has not only been full, but overflowing. Motherhood and mothering takes up so much of my time and energy. Managing the household does not come naturally to me; so things like dishes and laundry or even just cleaning up takes me forever and feels like drudgery. Also, nothing ever seems that clean, organized, or de-cluttered...even after I clean, organize, and de-clutter. Heck - even sitting down to write this post has felt like climbing a mountain. It took me about a week to write this post, because I just can't focus. The words felt forced. They weren't flowing. My attention has been in too many different places at once.
I feel like I have some form of motherhood ADHD all the time. Is this multi-tasking at its worst?
I have been thinking quite a bit about time management, and why it may be contributing to my feelings of being overwhelmed and being pulled in every direction all the time. Recently, I stumbled upon a few articles addressing the subjects of managing time and creating a schedule. The articles caught my eye, because after three and a half decades on this planet, I still struggle to adhere to a schedule and account for my time. As a stay-at-home mom, I have too much "open space" or grazing time on my calendar on any given day, which is both a blessing and a curse. I am someone who wanders a lot, who gets inspired easily, but also distracted too easily by any and every possible shiny thing that comes my way (or graces my phone/computer screen, too). This wandering quality is great when I want to have a free day with my daughter and we can go where the wind takes us, but for all of the "real" days in between, it makes life tougher.
In my role as a stay-at-home mom, I feel like some days are amazing. I get a lot done, and I feel like superwoman. Other days, not so much. It's those "not so much" days that frustrate me and keep me feeling stuck. I think the frustration is a build up of letting my household chores pile up, feeling powerless against an ever-growing "to do" list, and ultimately (going back to my earlier point about having too much space to graze) not adhering to a set schedule. This has become enough of an annoyance and disturbance for me to want to address it.
For the past month, I have taken a step in the right direction with time management. I have scheduled some self-imposed "me" time after dinner before K's bath. I slip out of the house for about twenty minutes of alone time to walk my dog. I wrote about this back at the end of May, and I have been adhering to it. This seemingly small yet enjoyable part of my day has become something I can rely on for my mental (and physical) health. It is giving me hope that I can continue to work on scheduling the things I consider not-so-enjoyable.
So for this week (and beyond), I am going to work on having an actual laundry day, scheduled times to load and unload the dishwasher, getting to bed before 1AM, etc. Watch out, domestic world. I'm coming for ya.
Do you have time management down to a science? Or are you still a work-in-progress like me?